Saturday, August 2, 2014

Dream Crushers

I recently started a new job, and it gives me lots of time to ponder my future, and things that happen around me. My most recent thought I can't just pass up. I NEED to share it. The world needs to hear this. We need to change.
If you can guess, this isn't a light subject. Not super intense, but deep, and something we need to think about.
A few days ago, I realized that there is such a thing as a dream crusher. I feel like that isn't the right word to use, but it's the only one I can think of that will work. Let me explain.
I am in the process of moving to New York. I am going to be a nanny, and I will be able to travel. I haven't always dreamed about being a nanny, but for a while I have thought it would be an enjoyable job. I would be making a difference in some children's lives, I would get to know them, I could practice being a mom, etc. I have always loved working with kids. Now traveling, on the other hand I have ALWAYS wanted to do. I can remember in third grade there was a girl who always traveled, and I was always so jealous. I love experiencing new cultures, and I have always known that I wanted to travel a lot. So moving to new york is definitely fulfilling one of my dreams, and helping me prepare for my future, and maybe even helping me decide my career goals. Not only that, but I feel like my heavenly father wants me to go. At one point, I had given up on this whole moving thing (I will explain more in a minute). That very day after I had decided, I saw at least 30 "follow your dreams", "don't let people decide your destiny", and "do what you want with your life, not what other want you to do" videos. If there was just one video, I would have passed it off as a coincidence, but I honestly don't think that was. I had never seen that many before that day, and still haven't ever seen that many since then. Pretty sure that was Heavenly Fathers way of saying it was okay, and I needed to go.
Now, the reason I had given up on this job, was because people around me were trying to convince me not to. It would be "to hard", "dangerous", "risky", "too much to handle", and they were constantly telling me that I was crazy.  I had two siblings (and their wives) supporting me. My parents were against it, and still are, and my sister who is on a mission tried for a long time to get me to stay home. I have nothing against them, but they are dream crushers. They were so concerned that this was such a big change for them and me, that it just wasn't worth it. It seemed like what I wanted to do wasn't important. What was important was doing what is sane. It was if they were telling me to Stay in my comfort zone, don't do anything drastic and to follow others paths, even if thats not what you want out of life.
They're Dream Crushers. They don't want you to follow your dreams, they want you to stay safe and not take risks.
So why didn't I listen to them?
I recently graduated high school. As I was handed my diploma, I made a promise to myself. What led up to is was each time I saw the dance team perform, I wished I had tried out. I wished I had taken art classes. I wished I had tried more things. So I made a promise to myself, that I wouldn't regret not doing things ever again. I promised that if I ever had the thought "I want to try that." I would do it. I don't want to miss opportunities anymore. I don't want to be on my dying bed wishing I had done something else. I want to be able to look back on my life and have experienced more things than college. And ever since I made that promise, I have loved life. New York is just another one of those "I want to try/do" things. I KNOW I will regret not going.
Anyways. Enough of that. Lets get down to the deep stuff.
I have something sad to tell you. We have all had our dreams crushed, and we ourselves are dream crushers.
 I know what you are thinking. "i've never crushed anyones dreams."
You haven't? You've never ever told someone that a dream or IDEA (ideas lead to dreams.) they had was dumb? Or weird? Or that it wouldn't work? Maybe you said it wasn't worth it, Or that it would badly? You can't justify that you knew from experience. Maybe a few times, but I doubt that every single time you KNEW that it was a bad idea or that it would end badly.
The thing is, its not completely your fault you are a dream crusher. We are raised to think inside the box, and not branch out. Change is a "bad thing." I see parents telling their kids "No, we can't do that." or "you have quite the imagination." and saying things that are basically telling their kids that what they want is not important. We are tearing people down and raising others to do the same. It NEEDS to stop. We need to start being supportive of the things people want to do. Even if we know it will end poorly, support them. And when it does, be there for them.
We need to stop preventing people from experiencing the things they want to, and we need to start helping them find ways to do what they really want.
I am pleading with you. Please remember what it feels like to be told that something you want so dearly is "a waste", and stop doing the same to others. We as a humanity need to help others achieve things. We need to not tear them down. We need to support.
And if there is something you want to do, DO IT. Don't let others determine your destiny. Start now. Don't wait to have an eye opening moment like I did. I learned too late. And I can promise you, you'll learn too late. But, you still have time to change and do what you truly want. You may have missed opportunities, but more are on their way. Stop looking for others' approval and take those opportunities if you even slightly want to, and encourage others to do the same. Don't wait until you are told you are dying to do things you want. Start now.
We need others to survive, so lets make surviving bearable by helping each other live happily!

Monday, December 10, 2012


Socks... Man these things could be the death of me. Well, not literally, but almost. Why? I will tell you why.
Everybody has their daily routines... wake up, eat breakfast, go to work/school, I think you get my point. But one of mine? Looking through my drawers trying to find 2 socks that are kind of similar. I don't care if colors match, but how awkward would it be to have a knee high sock and then an ankle sock? Very! And that is exactly why it's part of my routine. Because I lack organization skills when I comes to socks. I (in the moment... Afterwards it's not so true) would much rather search for a few minutes (more like 5...) in the morning than take the time to put them together. And because of that laziness, it is part of my daily routine. I get all dressed, and I have to mentally prepare for my sock search. I will tell you honestly, I suck at it. That's why it takes me so long to find them.
Heck... I could... I don't know... Start a religion that gathers every lazy, un-sock-organized, morning sock searching soul together. I could call it the "sock searchers." It's that much a part of my routine.
What could I do with that time I spent in the morning if I didn't have to search for my socks? Probably a lot but I wouldn't know... I haven't ever had that time.
Anyways.... That's my whole shpeel on socks... And how they are starting to take over my life.
What is the "sock" in your situation?

Friday, December 7, 2012


Sometimes I struggle with being productive. But I think I figured out the trick. :) here's the story. I took on the responsibility of accompanying a piece of music for choir. I didn't get time to practice till about Tuesday. I thought it looked pretty easy so I wasn't too stressed about it. Little did I know... It's probably the most intense song I have ever tried to learn. So how do I get myself to practice? (More than I already have... Which has been about 15 hours this week...)
This is how.

Tuesday, December 4, 2012

A hard choice to make

Dear tatertotexpress blog,
I seem to have forgotten about you with my new blog... I promise it's not you, it's me. And my lack of ability to stay on top of this blog. New things are just so exciting... You know?
I promise I will make time for you too... I just need to figure out how more things I can tell you about. So I am sorry... Oh! Here is a topic. Lets give this one a go, shall we?

So the other day (Saturday) I found out one of my acquaintances (that I honestly don't like all that much...) was spreading rumors. Now I'm not one to make a decision right then and there unless I absolutely have to. So I thought about it for a few days. It was a hard decision I could have...
-smacked her
-freaked out at her for saying crap
-stood up for myself
-told a teacher
-try and talk it out with her
Really the list goes on. But what did I decide to do? Kill her with kindness. Because in the long run, if the people she tells believe her, they aren't really my true friends. And who looks worse in the end? The one being kind and putting up with the drama, or the one making the lies and drama? I think we all know the answer.
I will be honest, I am pretty proud of myself. That's not an easy decision. What would you have chosen?

Friday, November 9, 2012

"Do you need help?"

Tonight, I was taking some things out to our car for my mom, and one of these things was a huge box full of glass bricks. I was trying to open the car door as a man walked by and he saw I was struggling and asked me "do you need help?" I of course said yes, but that's not what I was getting at. Think about that question.
Do you need help?
He could have just walked by, it would have been normal. But he was willing to ask that simple question, Do you need help? And I have been pondering it for a few minutes. I want to be like that. Willing to ask a stranger if they need help. This man had a huge impact on me with four words. Four. Imagine if I used those four words four times. Would I impact four people? Or even just make their burden lighter?
Another thought that was brought up by this is that I am making the choices I need to make, and putting myself in the right places at the right time. Not just with going outside at the right minute, but everything in my life.
I was just thinking about the choices that I had made this year, and how if I didn't make them my life would be so different. Had I not been in choir, I wouldn't have made the friends I have made this year, and they are some of the best I have ever had. Just simple things like choosing to audition for choir, or choosing to take a class has made a huge impact on my life. I have been so hard on myself thinking that I'm not where I should be. But, those four words "do you need help?" Made me realize I'm not. I'm where I should be. Of course I could be doing things better, but I'm where I need to be.
So all in all, my new goal is to ask at least one person if they need help. A stranger or friend, I will ask, and I challenge you to do the same.

It Snowed!

Since you can't see me, I will just tell you I am doing a little victory dance. Yes... It's true.
I love the snow soooo much! And it has been snowing half the day, and so I have been super excited since it started. Again... I love the snow. So I am super happy.

Thursday, November 8, 2012


Well, music has now become my life. I kinda feel like I'm saying goodbye to the world and completely involving myself to music, school, and sleep.
Back when we were having choir auditions I had to decide if I was actually willing to put a ton of my time into music... And I decided I loved it enough to. It was worth it. Luckily, I am actually willing to Spend most of my free time practicing and learning music.
And here I am... Spending a couple hours a day practicing piano, learning choir music, and singing.
It may be stressful, but I love it.